Andalite House
by Celebratory Flamethrower
Summary: What happens when the most arrogant Andalite in existence is sent to a human college?
1. Prologue

/thought speak/

* * *

/Really, sir, I can't understand why I have to go./

/It's quite simple. You need the experience./

/I have plenty of experience-/

/Yes, in the laboratory. You're very good at understanding data. Unfortunately for you, exobiology is about living creatures, something you find much harder to understand./

/Professor, they are such a backwards race-/

/They are a backwards race that defeated an enemy we could only fight to a stalemate. And it only took five of their _children _to do what we couldn't. Really, Artfor, try to show more respect./

/Technically, sir, they had an Andalite there to show them what to do./

Approximately ten minutes ago, the professor of exobiology of the Andalite Homeworld's most prestigious academy had dismissed his class for the day. As they left, he stopped one of his best and, at the same time, most troublesome students. Artfor was a very gifted young Andalite with a stubborn streak, one of the most profound senses of arrogance the Andalites ever produced, and a passion for studying other worlds that the professor had rarely seen. However, Artfor was very reluctant to study living creatures; he prefered to observe things from a distance.

This approach could only take Artfor so far, and the professor hated to see a talent like his go to waste. The professor mulled over this problem, until one day he talked to his shorm, a professor of theoretical physics, about his student. His shorm told him of an idea the government was going to try, something they had received from the humans. It was called a Foreign Exchange Student Program.

/You've missed the point again, Artfor. That Andalite was even younger that you are, and if you remember, he took one of the humans as his prince./

/Sir, I refuse to go./

/Nonsense! I had to call in every favor I had to get you accepted in to the program./ The professor was beginning to get agitated by his student's stubbornness, and decided that it was time to use his trump card. /I've already talked to your parents about it, and they agree it will be good for you. If you still want to opt out of the program, I'm sure they would have something to say to you about it…/

Artfor now realized that he had lost the argument. In a sign of defeat, he lowered his tail blade a slight amount, and asked, /Alright, I'll go, but explain this idea to me again./

The professor smiled as only an Andalite can, and said, /You will go to what the humans call a college. It is their version of our academies. You will participate in all of the classes a human would take, and live your life among humans for three hundred and sixty five of their days, which, I believe, is one of their years. As you learn about them, a human will take your place and learn about us. The human will live with your family, and will attend your classes-/

Artfor snorted, and said, /I'm sure a mere human would not be able to understand your lessons fully./

/You do realize that they have proved a great many theories wrong? Without them, we may never have learned about the seers of the Hork-Bajir, or that Taxxons could so much as attempt to control their instincts./

/That was merely... luck. Still, sir, this is a bad idea. No mere human deserves to see our educational system, and there is nothing we can learn from theirs./

/That attitude is precisely why you are going. They are our closest allies. They defeated the Yeerks, not us. Their body structure is the strangest out of all sentient species. And they are perfect for you to study, as we truly don't know very much about them. There is much about them that even _they _don't know! Artfor, you must learn to respect them. There is much that they can teach you that I can not/. The professor paused, and stared into space with his main eyes, thoughtfully. When at last he remade eye contact with his pupil, he seemed much more at peace, and calmly said to Artfor, /Now go and gather what you wish to take with you. Your ship leaves at daybreak. /

Having no more arguments to hide behind, Artfor angrily left the office. The rest of that day was a living hell for him. Whenever he had time enough to let his mind wander, he kept remembering the grievance his professor had forced upon him. He was constantly trying to think of a way out of his situation, but noting seemed like it would work. Even the ancient art of faking illness, practiced by reluctant children across the universe, could not help him, as the disappointment, and later anger, of his parents would be the only thing possibly worse than leaving the homeworld.

Eventually, the last of his classes ended, and Artfor began walking he arrived at his scoop, his parents had, of course, already heard the news. Throughout the evening, their exclaimed their happiness that their own son would participate in an event only ten of the most gifted Andalite students would experience. Artfor, predictably, was less than enthusiastic throughout the night. Amazingly, his family was even excited that the human that would replace Artfor would be living with them! Artfor was shocked by this idea. Did they really believe a mere human would be able to handle his way of life? However, as he brooded, the thought of one of those brutes living with his family began to give him hope. They would be able to have a good look at these crude beings, and when they realized exactly what they had sent him off to live with, they would call him back!

With this desperate hope, he chose what he would take to the new planet. He packed lightly, taking only a hologram of his parents. He soon fell asleep, but was awoken an hour before dawn by the scoop's main computer, giving him just enough time to get to the spaceport and catch his ship, a re-commissioned and slightly modified Dome Ship, now transporting cargo and passengers between Earth and the Andalite Home World. As it left his solar system he stood in the dome, looking back towards his increasingly distant home planet, and wondered when he would see it again.


	2. In transit

Artfor stared out towards the blank realm of zero-space. Since the ship had left the Andalite home world, he had not moved. He stood there, alone, contemplating his cruel fate, constantly attempting to think of a way out of his predicament-

/Hello!/

-and was thus quite understandably surprised when an Andalite female about one Andalite year older than him decided that he looked like someone interesting to talk to.

Artfor cursed himself. He had been so wrapped up in his problem that he didn't even think to constantly scan the area around him with his stalk eyes. In his culture, that was considered…not quite rude, but it showed a lack of interest in those around him, implying a lack of respect, mixed with the complacency of a buffoon. Artfor was shocked that he had allowed himself to perform such a taboo, but was greatly taken aback at her response, which was simply to ignore it.

/I heard that you were one of the others in the exchange student program/ she said. /Isn't it exciting to go to such an amazing place?/ she asked sincerely, to Artfor's amazement. Just as Artfor was about to answer with a witty retort, however, she continued talking, saying /I can't wait to get there. The humans sure know how to make their food./

At last Artfor understood. The female had joined the Andalite Starfleet (as a science officer, of course, no female could be expected to perform well in combat) right before the war ended, where she was given the morphing power, probably for her to become a spy. The yeerks were then promptly defeated, and she was moved to one of the civilian academies. With the morphing power, she had experimented with the one thing even Artfor admitted the humans were better at: eating. He could understand admiring humans for their mouths, since tasting was the only thing they could do right-

/There planet is just marvelous, too. It's almost completely covered with water. The humans say that their largest ocean has more water than our entire planet! And did you know that the name for their planet translates directly into our language as "land"? Humans are so strange sometimes…/

Artfor was beginning to like the girl. He could agree that the human homeworld had a lot of water, as that was a logical fact. And at least this female thought the humans were crude-

/…but I just love them!/

It was at this time that Artfor realized the female was suffering from the same insanity as the professor that sent him on this journey, and began scanning the area around him for a way to get out of the conversation before the female infected him with it. With no convenient way to escape politely, he was forced to listen as she rambled on.

/Their music is really interesting, too. They have all kinds of styles, but I've only been able to hear one song, and it moved a lot quicker than our songs did. The human I was listening to it with called it the "Funeral March". They always name their things so strangely! Anyway, it took a little getting used to, but it was pretty good. It's strange, though, the human was sad when they played it…/

Artfor finally realized where her astonishing lack of tact came from. She had talked about the others in the exchange program earlier. Artfor had completely forgotten that other Andalites would be going to the human homeworld, but it made sense that they would be sent on the same ship. It also made sense that the other students had actually been excited about winning, and wanted to live amongst the humans, thus explaining the current conversation. It was also logical that a few of the students had already met humans, and the female seemed to have spent quite some time with them, learning their ways, and forgetting the rules of polite society.

Before he could further analyze her further, however, the ship trembled, almost knocking over many of the passengers. A message then resounded through the entire ship, saying /This is an announcement from the Captain. It appears that the area of zero-space we are in is contracting. We should get to the human homeworld sooner than expected, but we will encounter a bit of turbulence. That is all./

/Oooh, turbulence. That should make things more exciting. You know the humans have a saying, "Getting there is half the fun". Hey, that guy looks interesting./ She ran off, as quickly and as startlingly as she arrived, leaving Artfor to ponder the conversation he just had without ever saying a word.

/"Getting there is half the fun"?/ He thought to himself. /Usually, arriving at the destination is either a moment of relief and joy, or dread. So why would the journey be "fun"? Isn't it better for the journey to be quick (or, in my case, long) and uneventfull?/ Eventually, he realized this line of reasoning was merely another example of how primitive the humans were, and went back to staring at Z-space, thinking of ways to get out of his situation when he wasn't recovering his footing from the tremors that rocked the ship.

* * *

**Author's note:** Truth be told, this wasn't supposed to be the next chapter. I just had this idea, and it wouldn't go away. Consider this an extra.

Now, a bit of explanation. This story is taking place seven (human) years after the end of the Yeerk-Andalite-Human war. The Animorphs have already left the planet at this time to rescue Ax, but have not been heard from again. No, I'm not going to have them come home in this story. At most, I'll only give a reference to them.

Thank you, reviewers! I hope this chapter is as good as the first.


	3. Arrival

"…And this is the Library. Our University has a prestigious collection of rare books, and we keep them in this building. As a student, feel free to borrow any books that interest you. Now over here is a famous statue of the university mascot…"

Artfor sighed. He had been on the human home world for close to two hours, and was weary of the "cultural achievements" that the head of the human college kept showing him. Here he was, feigning interest in the primitive architecture of a place he never wanted to visit, while all around him savage creatures stared at him, as if _he_was an oddity. Hundreds of humans navigated the sprawling campus, darting in and out of buildings on their two legs, stopping quickly to look at the visitor to their planet, but never falling. Truth be told, Artforhad never seen a livehuman, he had only looked at primitive still holograms, or "pictures", of them, but now that he could see them move, it was miraculous that they could so much as stand.

Actually, it seemed miraculous to Artfor that they knew where they were going. This place was so disorganized that even Artfor, who prided himself on always knowing where he was on _his_ planet, began to feel lost after only a few minutes of walking.

"…And that is our main lecture hall, where, of course, you will listen to lectures from your professors…"

The human giving him all of this advice was shorter and rounder than what appeared to be the norm, never stopped talking, and claimed to be in charge of the college. He called himself "Dean Albert Johansson", which surprised Artfor. Surely, even humans must think "Dean" is a ridiculous name?

"…And these are the dorms," said Dean. They had stopped right outside of a large, square building which Artforthought looked even less attractive than the others. "This was an old, run-down hotel that we converted to a dormitory when we built the college. Your room is 7a, on the eighth floor. Follow me." Artfor followed Dean into the building, into what Dean called a "lobby." It was a spacious room, but not extremely large, causing Artfor to wonder what rank of human received this space. Artfor was even more confused by the fact that many humans were in it. When he asked Dean why so many humans appeared to be living here, he was mildly surprised by his response, which was to laugh, long and heartily. Dean was beginning to remind Artfor of the female he met on the ship…

Finally, Dean calmed down, and explained that the lobby was a social area, belonging to no one in particular. This seemed very similar to the domes in his own species' main battleship, but Artfor couldn't help but feel superior at how the domes were both larger and more beautiful than human "lobbies".

As Artfor scanned his new environment, Dean had moved next to a wall, and pressed a button. One "minute" later, when Artfor was becoming just a little bored, he heard a bell softly ring. This unnerved Artfor, who raised his tail blade into a fighting position, expecting a predator to attack. His instincts gave way to shock as a silvery piece of the wall moved, revealing a very small room. Dean entered the room, and motioned for Artfor to follow when he didn't immediately enter. Curious, Artfor entered, wondering what was happening.

After he entered, Dean pressed a button on the wall. Artfor was startled when the wall moved again, sealing him into the small room. His species' claustrophobia immediately overtook him, mixing with his distrust of humans to create a strange thought: the humans must have had been planned to capture as many of the smartest, most trusting Andalites as they could. The room had sealed him in, thinking that he would not be suspicious of humans. They would then hold him hostage for information! He looked around and, seeing no escape, swore that he would not go down without a fight.

Only seconds before Dean would have been cut to ribbons by Artfor's tail blade, the floor beneath them lurched. Artfor was taken momentarily off balance, and as he regained his footing, some of Dean's pointless banter made its way into Artfor's brain.

"Sorry about that, these old elevators have a bit of a kick to them. And they always start moving at a different time, too. Which reminds me of an amusing anecdote…"

Moving? Artfor was in shock. Had the humans developed some form of technology that allowed their structures to move? Had they invented some form morphing for buildings?

As he was pondering the possibilities, the door to the "elevator" once again opened. As they exited the room, Artfor remembered that the humans were supposed to answer questions about their world. Feeling that the humans had finally presented him with a respectable cultural achievement, he interrupted Dean's lecture, which had somehow moved to the topic of something called television, to ask, /Sir, you say this "elevator" moved us? How? Did you rearrange the building?/

"No, my good man, the elevator runs up a shaft," said Dean, slightly confused.

/Ah, I see, you have a designated area where the elevator can move freely. So, do you use antigravity, or generate thrust with a rocket?/

"Neither, we use a pulley."

/A what?/

"A pulley," said Dean, slightly perplexed at having to explain such a simple concept to such an advanced form alien. "You know, a rope is attached to the elevator at one end, the top of the shaft in the middle, and runs back down the shaft to attach to a motor at the other end. The motor pulls the rope down, and the elevator goes up."

/That's it?/

"Yes."

/Then why did you need to push a button inside the elevator, if you weren't giving a flight mechanism instructions?/

"The buttons are to tell the motor how far up to pull the elevator," said Dean, slightly exasperated at what he saw as the immense stupidity of a supposedly brilliant creature.

/And why the moving wall?/

"You mean the door? It's so that people don't accidentally hurt themselves."

/Ah. I see/ Artfor said, slightly disappointed. Here he was, amazed at human inventiveness, beginning to understand why so many of his peers liked them, when he is told that he was awed by the simplest of machines. Instead of learning a lesson from this, he decided to go back to his old standby of disliking humans on general principal.

"Now that we've got that sorted out, follow me, and I'll introduce you to your roommate," Dean said irritably.

* * *

Once again, I would like to thank the kind reviewers. I would also like to answer Lugger's questions.

No, you probably won't be seeing other Andalite students. I would like to focus this story on Artfor. However, I don't have the entire story mapped out, so anything is possible.

As for showing how the human taking Artfor's place is doing... I like that idea. I'm definitely going to use that, but it's probably going to be a separate story, though.

All right then. Next chapter, the real story starts.


	4. Meeting

"Now listen, my boy, let us in!"

Dean and Artfor werestanding outside of room 7a, waiting for Artfor's new roommate to open the door. Once every few seconds, Dean would loudly hit his hand against the door in an effort to summon the occupant. That seemed primitive, even for humans. Could they not think of a better way of making themselves known instead of hurting their hands?

"You've left us out here long enough, I dare think!"

They had been there for five of the local units of medium-length increments of time, or "minutes". When they had first arrived, Dean had thumped his hand against the door softly. When no one answered, Dean slowly became angry. Eventually, as his screams and curses at the unseen occupant grew louder, his face became red.

"As Dean of this college, I _demand_ you let us in!"

Like many Andalites before him, Artfor was astonished by this occurrence. He wondered for a minute whether humans had a form of natural camouflage, or if skin color was a non-verbal form of communication with humans. Then he remembered that he was supposed to hate them all, and promptly lost interest.

"I know you're in there-"

"You know who's in there, sir?"

Dean jumped when the voice spoke. He turned around to see another male, much younger and taller than him, with dark brown hair and only the beginnings of a "beard", unlike the long white one that Dean had. This caused Artfor, who had known about the new human standing behind them for the past five "minutes" ever since he had walked up behind them, to wonder if these "beards" were a sign of social position.

Artfor then proceeded to mentally kick himself for becoming interested in the humans again.

"Ah, my boy, there you are!" Dean exclaimed happily, "This is your new roommate-"

"Yeah, I kinda figured that," said the newcomer, moving towards the door. "I mean, the only Andalite that could possibly want to come here is the one you've been reminding me every afternoon about," Artfor wasn't the greatest judge of human vocal patterns, but he could almost swear that there was a hint of insolence in this human's tone. "You know, the one you've been wanting me to fix up the dorm for. The one that's apparently going to be living with me for the next year, instead of my most trusted friend."

If there was any malice in the younger male's words, Dean didn't seem to notice. "Ah, keen intellect you have, my boy!" he said.

The human was now at the door, and had inserted a piece of metal into it. He twisted it, and it opened, revealing a series of small, connected rooms. For the second time in ten minutes, Artfor was amazed at how human technology reached into areas his species had never even considered. Here they were, unable to even achieve Z-space communication, but their locking mechanisms seemed to bend the laws of physics!

Before he could investigate the implications of this breakthrough further, the two humans entered the room, derailing his train of thought. They stood inside and stared at him for a few seconds. Eventually Artfor realized he would have to enter, and though the thought of entering such a confined space made his claustrophobia flare up again, he swallowed his pride and walked in. He was determined not to let this humans see him afraid.

Once he had come inside, the two humans quickly finished their conversation.

"I've been showing him around all day. Please help him however you can, and give him the grand tour of the dorm."

"No problem, Dean. I'd _love _to spend some of my precious time teaching an Andalite what a tooth brush is." Again, Artfor thought this human sounded almost condescending to his superior, an idea he, like most Andalites, found shocking.

But again, Dean didn't seem to notice, as he quickly left the room, smiling, claiming to the human that he "knew he could trust" the human.

Left alone with a human whose name he did not even know, but who he would apparently be living with, Artfor did the only thing any properly arrogant Andalite would do: get the human's name while acting haughtily.

/I don't believe we have been introduced. My name is A-/

"Your name is exactly the same as all the other Andalites. Long, lacking proper rhythm, and beginning with a vowel." Artfor was shocked. All of the humans he had talked to so far had been incredibly polite and humble, as they should be. But here was a human acting like _Andalites_ were crude, unimportant creatures!

/Excuse me, not all Andalite names start with a vowel-/ Artfor began, offended.

"No, just ninety percent of them, and they all sound exactly the same to me. Now, I'vebeenasked to give you the grand tour. That's the bathroom, were you wash yourself and dispose of certain types of refuse. You'll figure it out. That's the kitchen, where I make food, and you have no real purpose in being there, as you have no mouth. That's the bed. It's were I sleep, and is not to be stood on. Any questions? No? Good," the human said quickly. These sentences were said so fast that Artfor hadn't even realized if the human had asked if he had questions yet.

"If you need me to explain some trivial object to you, I'll be reading," the human said as he sat on the bed. He picked up a small, beaten-up hard-copy computer file, or "book", that had been carelessly thrown on it, and began reading it in a way that seemed to say that if Artfor was still there when the human looked up there would be trouble.

Realizing he wasn't being respected properly, Artfor decided that a little more insolence was called for. /Excuse me, but we still don't know each other's names/ he said, icily.

"That's because I have very little interest in your name, unless you spontaneously trade places with my best friend Mike, who they seem to believe you can replace," the human said without looking away from his book.

This explained some things. Artfor remembered being told he would be filling in for a human. He had forgotten that he would be living the life of another creature in the exchange program. Apparently, this human's shorm was sent to the Andalite home world against this human's wishes. Artfor felt a small bit of pity for the human, before remembering his own predicament.

Still, he felt he should be a bit kinder with his words. After all, he was a guest on this planet. /My name is Artfor. I humbly ask that you tell me yours/ he said diplomatically.

"…Victor, not like you need to know," the human said, quietly, after a short pause.

A moment of silence passed, with Artfor scanning the small rooms and Victor silently reading his book. Eventually, Artfor remembered a question he had been meaning to ask.

/Excuse me, _aristh _Victor-/

Victor quickly looked up and asked, "Why are you calling me an _aristh_?"

/Well, you are a student at the human version of an academy, yes?/

"Yes.."

/Then in my culture, you are an _aristh. _It's a low rank, but still an honor./

"No need for your _formalities_. Just call me Victor," said Victor angrily, as he looked down at his book again.

/Yes, _aristh_ Victor. I would like to know how your locking mechanisms work./

"I'm sorry, you want to know how what works?" Victor said, staring back up at Artfor in shock.

/Specifically, how do you get that piece of metal to go through the door without leaving a hole? Is it a hologram?/

Victor stared at Artfor for a few more minutes before pointing out the narrow slot in the doorknob Artfor had missed, and then spent the next few minutes explaining the concept of keys.

* * *

Well, I'm finally back after far too long. Sorry, but school's been killing me lately.

I'm glad that you guys seem to be enjoying it, and I promise to get the next one out a bit quicker. After the next one, I'm going to take a look back and see if there are any typos I can fix or areas I can flesh out.

Thanks once again, kind reviewers.


	5. Awakening

"Wake up, four-eyes."

A strange sound startled Artfor awake. His stalk eyes scanned around him, looking at a strange panorama. He saw walls everywhere. His species' claustrophobia flared up, causing him to begin calculating escape routes. He saw a freakish creature, and immediately arced his tail, ready to strike, to drive it back-

And then the events of the previous night caught up with him. He stopped himself from striking at the "tele-vision", lowered his tail blade so as not to frighten or offend Victor, and watched the human as he exchanged the artificial skin on his upper half for one of a different color and material, for no detectable reason.

Although Andalites had long since known of the human's artificial skin, or "clothing", only a few knew what they looked like underneath them. Humans seemed remarkably attached to their "clothes", and would never let themselves be seen without at least some of them on. This was even stranger as they frequently exchanged them for ones that looked only slightly different. Although some rarely, if ever did this, some changed their "clothes" several times a day, begging the question of why they were even used in the first place.

Victor had finished changing his "clothes" at this time, and had stepped into the "bathroom" next to the living quarters, and closed the door. Artfor wondered why humans so willingly divided their homes into smaller and smaller groupings, and how they could stand to live in such confined quarters. Then he wondered how he would be able to survive a year in this cave-like environment. Then he wondered why humans had evolved the need to sleep on "beds", which seemed to only take up space during the daylight hours, in an attempt to get his mind off his own problems.

Artfor had slept (standing up, of course, as only a primitive species would sleep lying down. After all, a predator could come at any moment) in a space conveniently empty beside the door. Rotating his eyestalks in an attempt to fully wake up, he began to take in details of the room that he hadn't noticed before. He noticed the scattering of a few of the human items, namely, a "chair" and an ancient-looking leather "couch", as Victor had called it, were arranged around the tele-vision. He walked towards them, trying to detect the purpose they might serve.

Before he could ponder this strange pattern, however, Victor reentered the living quarters, walked past him, opened the door of the dorm, and said coldly, before leaving, "Today you have U.S. History and Zoology. The campus map's on the table. Try not to make a fool of yourself," and shut the door.

Artfor felt a rising tide of indignation rise up inside of him as Victor snubbed him once again. If only he could rid himself of the pesky human…

But no, part of the program was "living as the human you are replacing did", which meant he was stuck with Victor. And the human had already proved himself somewhat useful…

Artfor walked to the table. Last night, when Victor had grudgingly shown him around the room, he had fallen in love with the simplicity of the table. A raised, open-air storage platform, the possibilities of it amazed Artfor. You could cover it in decorations, or place important objects on it, and you wouldn't have to constantly look through cabinets to find them; all you would have to do is look at the top of your tables and see which one you had left it on. It was the only piece of human technology that Artfor felt comfortable enough to admit to be superior to anything that the Andalites could design.

Not that he'd admit that to anyone.

Artfor quickly found the "campus map", a piece of paper covered in lines, forming a multitude of different colored boxes. Artfor stared at it for ten "minutes before he was able to decipher it by remembering that humans built their buildings in the shapes of cubes and rectangles. He was then quickly able to find the location of the first class he was scheduled to take.

After checking the course catalog Victor had shown him the previous night, he determined that the class truly _was _called "us history". Artfor thought that it was hilarious that the humans couldn't even properly phrase "our history" in their own language.

Artfor immediately exited the dorm, entered the hallway, and prepared himself to withstand once more the trauma of the elevator. Several "minutes" later, he was still in front of the elevator, wondering what he was doing wrong. He soon realized that human creations wouldn't respond to thought-speak commands, and remembered that Dean had pushed a button to operate it. He soon found one near the frame of the door. Very soon after he pressed it, his instincts went haywire at a directionless tone, and the silvery doors opened.

Suppressing his fears, he entered the elevator, and was presented with a plethora of buttons, each marked with strange symbols. Having no idea what any of them meant, he randomly picked one, hoping that the humans weren't primitive enough to have placed a self-destruct switch on the elevator. By a strange coincidence, he chose correctly, and was soon outside of the dorms.

Once outside, Artfor began heading in the general direction of the Lecture Hall that "us history" used. After only a few turns, however, he found that the map of the college bore no similarity to the actual college in any way. But when he began to lose all hope, he came upon a miraculous feat of human engineering. It was a small wall, upon which a copy of the college map was hung. This was helpful, but what truly astounded Artfor was the small insignia on it: "You Are Here."

He wondered for a moment how the insignia would transfer itself if he moved the wall. Perhaps it had some form of nanobots to move the sign? Or perhaps it was simply a computer monitor? Either way, it proved the humans could actually build some practical electronics. Promising that he would come back later to run some experiments, he quickly assessed his location, and plotted a course to the lecture hall.

* * *

Okay, everyone who thought this fic was dead, please raise your hands. Come on, be honest. Wow... that many of you?

Well, it took me some time, but I finally motivated myself to continue. Expect a few long pauses from time to time, but rest assured, I REFUSE to let this fic die.

I'm going to spend the next week fixing as many of the massive amount of typos in the previous chapters as I can find... It looks like I've got quite a job to do.


	6. In session

With the map giving him his bearings, he was able to find the lecture hall very quickly. He stepped inside, wishing for the open-air classrooms of the Andalite home world, but knowing that, if the cave-like nature of the human's buildings he had seen was standard, then he would be faced with yet another constrictive, depressing environment.

He did not expect for the lecture hall to be a huge, cavernous… cavern. The floor had a slope as extreme as the Hork-Bajir home world, with many levels of flat ledges, each filled with "seats", leading downward in a circular path. Artfor wondered if perhaps the humans had built over an impact crater.

At the center of the pit stood another of those beautiful devices, the table. It was strangely shaped, though, being very tall, but narrow in all other directions. Much later, Artfor would learn that it was called a "podium". A human was standing behind it, speaking into a black device. This seemed to serve no purpose- until the human began speaking into it. A booming voice filled the room, startling Artfor, and saying in a high, nasally voice, "We will now examine the effects of the Emancipation Proclamation on Abraham Lincoln's re-election bid…"

When he noticed that the human at the center of the pit seemed to be speaking, Artfor calmed himself, guessing that the device recorded the human's voice, and caused a computer to string together sentences that were played very loudly over a speaker. Artfor also guessed that the system still had a few glitches, as almost none of the words the computer had just played made any sense. Surmising that the humans had recently moved their most advanced technology here in an effort to impress him, Artfor felt his natural Andalite superiority replace his instinctive fear, as what the humans must have thought of as their greatest masterpiece was riddled with bugs.

With a smile in his eyes, he found a comfortable spot at the top of the pit where he could watch the professor while scanning the room, and settled in for what he thought would be a simple, quick, relaxing class.

Thirty "minutes" later, he realized how foolish he had been.

Unpronounceable names were uttered with awe, unrecognizable dates were mentioned, incomprehensible events were spoken of, and the hundreds of humans seemed to know what they meant instantly. Artfor did not know what the "Civil War" was, nor why it was so important that the professor felt it necessary to spend an entire class teaching it. The numerous Andalite wars were only studied this intensively by war-princes, and no Andalite ever thought the social trends of the country to be this important. Artfor was amazed that us history, with such a simple name, would be so complex.

As Artfor struggled to find meaning in the professor's madness, he slowly began to track of the world around him. His stalk eyes stopped moving, his tail blade was dropped almost to the ground. He became oblivious to the absurd architecture of the lecture hall, to the masses of students impossibly perched on the ledges of the hall, even to the professor himself. His entire world was taken up in the shrill voice and the information it carried. He sorted, analyzed, obsessed with uncovering the secrets of the humans he had despised. And against his better judgment, a smile tugged at his eyes. Here, at last, was a problem worthy of his abilities. Here, in the hell-hole the humans called a planet, he had found something he hadn't realized he was looking for. Absorbed in the act of discovery, he was, without knowing why, happy.

Which is why he didn't notice the professor nudge the black device.

An earsplitting shriek filled the room. Unlike the soft, quick chime of an elevator, which simply triggered paranoia, the cacophony the device produced drowned out all thought, all reason, all emotions but fear, leaving Artfor a paralyzed wreck, too afraid to move but knowing that to stay still was certain death-

And as quickly as it came, the sound ended. Shaken to his core, Artfor examined the humans in their seats, and were astonished to see that they had exhibited only a mild discomfort.

"Damn feedback…" the professor muttered to himself, before returning to the lecture.

Disoriented, confused, and frightened, Artfor reignited the fires of his anger that the humans had almost put out. In his mind, he raged against the machine in front of the professor, which seemed to confirm his earlier opinion of humans; not only had they nearly succeeded in stopping his hearts out of fright; they _didn't even know how to work their creations correctly!_

An awful thought occurred to him, though, quickly cooling his temper; if the humans made such terrible devices to teach, what could they make to destroy? If they could make such an effective anti-Andalite weapon by _accident_, what could they create in a true war?

Artfor began to realize why the Andalite government was attempting to make the humans an ally.

* * *

Well, I haven't got a lot to say this time, other than "I've been studying the Civil War a lot this week. Can you tell?"


End file.
